Step by step.
As the weeks keep passing by, this new reality I am in has started to weigh more and more heavily on me. I have had ups and downs for the entire 11+ weeks of quarantine, but in the past two weeks or so the extremes have become – well – more extreme.
My ups have been relatively high and my downs have been frighteningly low. That makes the swings back and forth far more exhausting. Last week I hit a dramatic low point. Digging back out of that has been a difficult, but slow and steady process.
As the title of today’s post says, “Step by step.”
First, my back pain started to improve. That was step one. Then the weather took a turn for the better, with sunshine and manageable temperatures. Step two. Then I managed to get out of my house and spend a day at the Morton Arboretum to enjoy an actual day in nature. Step three.
Today, I was able to drive into the city and have an actual in-person fitting for the suit I had commissioned back in January. I drove downtown, found free parking, went to the shop and had a chance for actual, real, in person interaction with other human beings. Another step.
Tonight, I shook off my ennui and managed to cook a lovely meal for myself. I not only made a nice meal, but I plated it beautifully and broke out one of my nicer bottles of wine for a pairing. I deserve to pamper myself and I felt so much better after taking the time to create something tasty and beautiful. I am pasting in a photo below.
This weekend has been a turning point for me. I have finally started to divest myself of some of the baggage I have been carrying throughout this quarantine. I am getting far better at focusing on the ‘now’ instead of projecting into potential futures. I am letting go of caring about what others might say or think about me. For several days, I have been almost entirely divorced from social media and it feels liberating.
Overall, I feel as though I am taking small but deliberate steps towards a more focused, positive, and enlightened lifestyle. I think that crisis sometimes can lead to positive change, and for my personal life this quarantine and everything else associated with it has catalyzed some deep introspection and some significant shifts in how I think about myself and about the world.
I am not sure where the journey is taking me, but I am focusing on each step in the moment and not worrying so much about the destination.
Step by step.
It’s only Quarantine if it comes from the Quarante province of France. Otherwise, it’s just Sparkling Isolation.
Sparkling Isolation – Day 80