• Menu
  • Skip to left header navigation
  • Skip to right header navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to secondary navigation
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Before Header

  • Explore Chicago
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn
  • Pinterest
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

The Local Tourist

Experience the fascination of a tourist; Feel the comfort of the local

  • Travel the U.S.A.
    • The Midwest
      • Illinois
      • Indiana
      • Iowa
      • Kansas
      • Michigan
      • Minnesota
      • Missouri
      • Nebraska
      • South Dakota
      • Wisconsin
    • The South
      • Arkansas
      • Mississippi
      • North Carolina
      • Oklahoma
      • Texas
    • The West
      • Arizona
      • California
      • Colorado
      • Montana
      • Nevada
      • New Mexico
      • Utah
      • Wyoming
  • Travel Tips
    • Travel Now
  • Road Trips
    • Two Lane Gems
  • Cultural Travel
    • Arts and Culture
    • Attractions
    • Food and Drink
    • History
    • People
    • Roadside Attractions
  • Great Outdoors
    • Camping
    • Hiking and Active Travel
    • U.S. National Parks
  • Shop TLT
    • Travel Two Lane Gems
  • Travel the U.S.A.
    • The Midwest
      • Illinois
      • Indiana
      • Iowa
      • Kansas
      • Michigan
      • Minnesota
      • Missouri
      • Nebraska
      • South Dakota
      • Wisconsin
    • The South
      • Arkansas
      • Mississippi
      • North Carolina
      • Oklahoma
      • Texas
    • The West
      • Arizona
      • California
      • Colorado
      • Montana
      • Nevada
      • New Mexico
      • Utah
      • Wyoming
  • Travel Tips
    • Travel Now
  • Road Trips
    • Two Lane Gems
  • Cultural Travel
    • Arts and Culture
    • Attractions
    • Food and Drink
    • History
    • People
    • Roadside Attractions
  • Great Outdoors
    • Camping
    • Hiking and Active Travel
    • U.S. National Parks
  • Shop TLT
    • Travel Two Lane Gems
  • Contact
  • Work with TLT
  • Travel Writing

Sparkling Isolation – Day 17

April 3, 2020 //  by Tommy Hensel//  Leave a Comment

22shares

Sometimes I surprise myself.

In one of my earlier posts, I mentioned that I truly believe the Universe is kind. I also believe that everything happens for a reason. Today, I had a bizarre but ultimately transformational moment related to that.

I have long been a prolific journaler, normally hand written. Whenever I am going through something powerful – whether emotional or spiritual – I find journaling to be tremendously helpful. One of the weird things about that, however, is that sometimes – even when what I’m writing about is highly charged and even profound – I will forget about it as soon as it leaves my head and goes onto the page. It’s almost like writing is the point and once it’s out of my head, I can move on.

Today, I “accidentally” ran across something I wrote back in September 2019 while returning from an arts conference. Of course, I don’t believe in “accidents” so clearly I was meant to read it today. I was shocked. The thoughts I put down were so intense, so powerful, and so profound that I thought to myself, “How in the world could I have written that and then forgotten that I wrote it?”

As I thought more about it, I realized a couple of things. First, the energy remained in me even though the words had faded. Second, I wasn’t ready to embrace the truths that I revealed to myself – at least not six months ago. Third, my journey over the past week has opened the floodgates for greater awareness. Fourth, because of that I was ready today to read again what I wrote.

I am pasting my journal entry here since it now applies even more than it did six months ago. Strange how the Universe works.

Here’s what I wrote on the plane back from Minneapolis in September 2019:

So many thoughts and ideas and fears and energies pulsing in my body and mind. My utter exhaustion is as much psychic as it is physical. Some of my weariness is that somewhere deep inside me, there are things dying, things struggling, energies striving to create catalytic change. On deeper unconscious levels my spirit and body are in a powerful dance of conflict, resolution, confluence and change. I am at a point where I somehow still feel paralyzed by indecision – more aptly paralyzed by too many possibilities. I am also confused and afraid, wondering just what is happening, where it is going, what will be the results of this sea change going on in my psychic spiritual world. How does it manifest and where will it take me?

When I return, I cannot be the same person. I cannot be the same supervisor, the same employee, the same presenter, the same co-worker, the same friend. I am different and I feel the difference growing more and more on some deeper level. The world will strive to suck me back in.

I have to continue to remember that concept of Second Cybernetics – stay in the system on one side, but work to build a new system with new ‘norms’ on the other until I am ready to step fully into the new system.


I have to be vigilant in understanding just when I get sucked into the “old norm” and how to continue to embrace the newness of who I am becoming.

Things will never be the same now.

I know that everything written here would sound highly dramatic to anyone else, but it’s all exactly how I’m feeling. I am trying to express things that are not specific, that are deep and subterranean in my consciousness. The images are blurry, the concepts are large and amorphous. Still, the energy feels so primal and important. I cannot help but feel as though something very important has shifted for me in the past week.

I keep coming back to the idea of how frightened I am to return to the ‘status quo.’ It is so easy to just give up and capitulate to the power structures that are so intent on quelling innovation. It’s so easy to just become passive and silent again and to stop paying attention to the world. Hibernations feels like safety. The allure of safety, security, comfort – these are all hard to ignore. Also, the powerful forces of the hierarchy that controls us – controls me – are hard to fight. They work on so many levels, both active and passive/aggressive. Silence and obedience are rewarded and cherished and valued by these powerful forces. Speaking out, taking innovative actions, developing new paradigms – these are dangerous to the hierarchy and are punished in many subtle ways. I have to face down my fears here, and my overwhelm at the thoughts that try to sabotage me from my new path.

Like I said earlier, sometimes I surprise myself.

It’s only Quarantine if it comes from the Quarante province of France. Otherwise, it’s just Sparkling Isolation.

22shares

Category: ThoughtsTag: Sparkling Isolation

About Tommy Hensel

Tommy Hensel is the Director of the Fine and Performing Arts Center at Moraine Valley Community College (www.morainevalley.edu/fpac), a position he has held since January 2008. A native of Columbia, South Carolina, he has worked for more than 35 years as a professional actor, singer, stage manager, director, and arts presenter. He holds a B.A. in music and a B.A. in communication from Florida State University and an M.A. in theater from the University of South Carolina. He currently serves as Chair of the Illinois Presenters Network and is a board member of NAPAMA. He served as co-chair of the 2018 Arts Midwest Conference and currently sits on the professional development committees of both NAPAMA and Arts Midwest.

Prior to his move to Chicago, Tommy was an 11-year resident of the Seacoast region of New Hampshire where he served as Executive Director of the Rochester Opera House and sat on several non-profit arts boards. He has served on grant review panels for the New England Foundation for the Arts, New Hampshire Arts Council, Vermont Arts Council, and Illinois Arts Council. During his years as an arts presenter, he has also served on the juried showcase panels for the Arts Midwest Conference and Performing Arts Exchange.

Among his many theater credits, Hensel was the founding artistic director of the Harrisburg Shakespeare Festival (now part of the Gamut Theatre Group in PA). He has over 50 professional directing credits to his name and an extensive resumé as a theatrical performer and cabaret singer. In Chicago, he has a side "gig" as a restaurant reviewer for The Local Tourist website (http://chicago.thelocaltourist.com) and blogs about travel and food at https://www.tableforoneplease.com.

Related Stories

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 248

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Days 151 through 247

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Days 144 through 150

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Days 136 through 143

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 135

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 134

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 133

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 132

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 131

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 130

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 129

Tommy Hensel

Sparkling Isolation – Day 128

Previous Post: «Tavern Hotel in Cottonwood Arizona Two Lane Gems, Vol. 1: Chapter 20 – Schnecks and Switchbacks
Next Post: Two Lane Gems, Vol. 1: Chapter 21 – Sunny and Dry My… Castle Dome Mine Museum»

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Primary Sidebar

Your Cart

  • Contact
  • Work with TLT
  • Travel Writing

Site Footer

Disclosure

We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.

Privacy Policy

© 2021 · The Local Tourist · Experience the fascination of a tourist; feel the comfort of the local